How come every time I get so mad at you and then I hear you, and you act a little sick and I go all soft?

I can't continue being who I wanted to be initially. I couldn't remain mean.

And all these time it's been me talking, and hearing you really try to talk today was nice. And the cough was so horrible, but you still tried to talk to me. Makes me feel so much better than you just telling me to talk.

So fine, you knew I was mad and you knew how to play your way out of it. Whatever.

I know I still love you and miss you all the same. I just wish I didn't have to go through with all these crapshit.

Is it so difficult to stop needing/wanting someone there?

Cause it bloody hurts like hell.